go cry about it, why don't you...

i got a speeding ticket yesterday. i was going 55 in a 40. um, everybody does 55 down that road. it's completely desserted and super straight. i tried to work up some tears when the police officer came to my window the first time, but of course they didn't come until he hands me my ticket. then i can't stop. i'm such a baby....or emotional at least. i'm lucky that this is only my 2nd speeding ticket. it was bound to happen sooner or later, and i'm a frequent speeder (mara, ignore that last sentence). then, on top of that, he informs me that my car tags have expired. ok, this is my first car where i've been responsible for the car tags. i didn't know what to do! but i figured it out. so now i'm going to go pay my $400 or whatever for new tags, license plate (i moved counties) and my ticket fine. and i have to go to driving school! how stupid. but guess what? now you can take it online! it's genius. and only $30. so anyway, yesterday was not the best day of my life.

but then i got to spend much needed quality time with some very good girlfriends at "book club." always a good time. we were trying on halloween costumes, and i've decided on this one. trust me, it doesn't look this sexy on me. i used to be obsessed with rainbow brite. when i was little, i had 2 tv trays. one was rainbow brite and one was cabbage patch kids. whenever i had a friend over to play, i always made them use the cabbage patch tv tray, which at the time i thought was way less pretty than the rainbow brite. yeah, and i'm so wearing a side ponytail.

they're like totally real!

so i'm in chicago for a convention. i got here on friday and checked into my hotel. for starters, this is probably the nicest hotel i've ever stayed in. they call me "miss timmerman" when i call for room service. and don't even get me started on the minibar. i've never seen so many options in my life. so what if a shot of grey goose costs $9! yeah, it's nice.

on friday night i decide to be brave and go to a bar by myself. i ask the concierge where i should go and he says right across the street. so i go right across the street to "lux bar." it's a pretty happenin place at 6pm. i suddenly feel super insecure and kind of panic. i've already bought a glass of wine so i can't leave. the place is packed and there's not anywhere to sit except for one seat at the bar. it's by this old man, so i say whatever and sit down. this man starts talking to me...which is cool....i can talk to a stranger. i meet his friends...more old men...who keep giving me compliments and standing so close to me that i can feel their spit...YUCK. they were cool, though. after about 30 minutes (note: there are some HOT guys standing near us that keep looking at me, but probably think i'm some kind of golddigger hanging out w/these men so they end up leaving and leaving me brokenhearted)...one of the men, mark (think mafia) askes me if i want to go get dinner at this really nice french restaurant. ok...look...i don't know anybody in this city...i'm just trying to have a glass of wine and soak up the culture. i do NOT want to go eat dinner with this guy, even if he does know donald trump and tony soprano. not impressed. so then the stalking starts. i don't want to go eat dinner, well what am i going to do? oh, i'm going to walk around. can he come with me? no you can't. can i get your cell phone number. NO, i have your card. no you cannot buy me another drink. SERIOUSLY. you are like 60...get away from me. by this point, i'm super scared to go anywhere else by myself. i walk around and end up going back to my hotel to eat room service. just so you don't feel sorry for me....their room service is like the best food i've ever had in my whole life. chicken w/cheese tortellini and cheesecake (2 days in a row...remember, i don't have any friends). oh, and also at the bar that night, one of the "friends" told me i needed to spit my gum out. he said it made me look trashy. OH REALLY? i look trashy? who are you to judge me you old man hitting on a young (ok, not so young) girl from alabama? whatever.

most important part! i almost forgot! as i walk into my hotel (slyly (sp?) so mafia guys don't see me) guess who i make eye contact with standing at the front desk?? SPENCER PRATT. i know! and then there's heidi!!! i know that the hills is a stupid show and you can judge me or whatever, but i about freaked out. i tried to act cool and make them think i had no idea who they were. this girl was having her picture taken w/heidi and after s & h left in a cab, i heard the girl talking on her phone saying "i don't even LIKE heidi." nobody likes them - that's sad. and let me just tell you. spencer looks just as mean in person as he does on tv. and heidi wears a ton of makeup...shocker.

exciting times. and i shopped at h&m yesterday and the biggest Forever 21 i've ever seen. i like the cheap stuff, y'all. now i'm working....sitting at my booth. bored to death...

i'm an artist

bet you didn't know that! ok, not really. tonight i'm going to a little class called "sips n strokes." basically you are in a room with about 50 other people and everyone is watching a "real" artist paint a picture, and we just follow along. now, we are all painting the same thing, but everyone's painting turns out completely different. oh, and the most important part is that we drink wine the whole time! so fun! i think whoever came up with this concept is a total genius. you pay between $25 and $40 per painting, and all they have to provide is paint and canvasses! you bring your own wine. there are 5 locations in birmingham and one in atlanta, i think. something that's EXTRA special about tonight is that my sister is coming with me! she has never been before so it will be fun to do this with her. we don't get to spend much time together by ourselves without the kids. (LOVE the kids..don't get me wrong) my sister is not a big fan of wine (I KNOW..how are we in the same family?) so i probably won't be drinking either. especially since you-know-what still hasn't come in (see post below)! so, anyway, these are the two paintings i've done so far. these are the professional pictures so obviously mine don't look anything like them, but you get the idea. ok, nevermind...i couldn't find pictures and i'm too lazy to go back and delete that last sentence. so, instead i'll post a picture of me and my sister. for the record, i have another sister who is totally cool and in-style (thanks to moi), but she lives far away so we can't really do very many sisterly things together. sad :( and it's also sad that the only picture i could find of me and anne was like 2 years ago when i had blonde hair. i will have to bring my camera tonight!

update...

i did not get any imitrex. i decided to go ahead and have a few screwdrivers anyway. BAD IDEA. never again...

say what you need to say

i want to start out by saying THANK YOU to sharon for making my blog so cute!! i love it!

this week has been stressful - but in a weird way i like it when things are busy. at least then i feel useful and like i'm making a difference instead of getting paid to check my email and blog (whoops). so, throughout all this stress, i have discovered that i have an addiction. i used to take imitrex (migraine medicine) only when i had horrible i'm-going-die-if-this-pain-doesn't-stop migraines. but slowly i realized that imitrex works on WAY more things than migraines. it will cure ANY headache! who knew? oh and it also cures hangovers. it really is a miracle. so, i now take probably 2 a week or something like that. anyway, i realized i didn't have any in my purse this morning, so i went to look in my "medicine/anything bathroom related" drawer and there wasn't any in there either! the panic set in. i immediately call my Rx mail service and order a refill. but that will take a week to get here! so i spend a good hour of my day on the phone w/my doctor who tried to call me in an Rx to wal-mart, but they were going to charge me full price ($550!!!) since my insurance wouldn't cover it because i had already ordered a refill through the mail service thing. i even tried making a drug deal with this girl at work. "if you'll give me an imitrex i'll give you $10 or whatever you want really." she was out and didn't have any refills left. so finally the nurse at my doctor's office said she could probably get me some samples. the problem is - she hasn't called me back and my doctor's office is like 20 miles away.

all this to say - my name is mary beth and i'm addicted to imitrex.

in case you are wondering why i'm so intent on getting my hands on this drug - i would LIKE to have a few glasses of wine tonight at our company "social function" (where i must be limited to no more than 3 drinks in a 2 hour period or i will embarrass myself like i did last year), but i'm scared that i'll get a massive headache that i can't handle. i feel naked without my imitrex. so this blog is kind of a joke, so please hold your intervention plans (mara). i have many more serious addictions like pizza and finding the perfect blush.